Tuesday, February 3, 2009

Green tea drinkers and Securitisation

Today’s Client is Bank Hype (BH), an almost-there top three Nigerian bank. BH has a special retainer with LT & Co. which means they get to barge in the office and play important.

BH’s obese company secretary and another power-suit big shot (Head, Corporate Services, I think) come into the office, with all the drama and loud voices in the world.

After they scoop two sugar truckloads to their green tea (they actually demanded green tea because they are both on a diet), I settle down to my uncontested note-taker role.

Background- BH’s lending strategy and ‘aggressive marketing’ had resulted in a long term liquidity issue and LT’s legal expertise was called to the rescue.

Apparently, one can’t trust laymen to understand lofty legalese so Posh-Tall is providing legal opinion and explanation. And she does it well. She is brilliant. She introduces and explains securitisation in Naira and Kobo-speak. Soon, the green tea drinkers are mentally repackaging of most of their cash-flow producing financial assets into investment-worthy securities.

That way, BH’s balance sheet stays healthy, their customers are not overcharged to make up for the liquidity issues, LT comes out saving the (financial) world.

I love the law.

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