Wednesday, February 4, 2009

Latinese



“We will go with the programme strictu sensu”

I am trying hard not to giggle.

I’m taking minutes for Ergo Plc’s AGM. It’s bad enough that the meeting started nearly two hours behind schedule, now the company secretary is making everyone a little confused with a Latin mismatch.

Finally, the meeting is over and he tells me, with a huge grin, that he’s taking a long distance law programme- I can almost see his hand patting his back.


Latinese

4.33


“We will go with the programme strictu sensu”

I am trying hard not to giggle.

I’m taking minutes for Ergo Plc’s AGM. It’s bad enough that the meeting started nearly two hours behind schedule, now the company secretary is making everyone a little confused with a Latin mismatch.

Finally, the meeting is over and he tells me, with a huge grin, that he’s taking a long distance law programme- I can almost see his hand patting his back.


Freckles


I meet Bode with the freckles today just as I between the third and fourth floor.

“Hello Rookie”.

He has a wide smile and a strong grip for a handshake.

I hello back and naturally, we walk the rest of the way.

Freckles has just finished law school too. It’s nice sharing the bottom of the pyramid with someone else. It helps that he’s cute.

Tuesday, February 3, 2009

Green tea drinkers and Securitisation

Today’s Client is Bank Hype (BH), an almost-there top three Nigerian bank. BH has a special retainer with LT & Co. which means they get to barge in the office and play important.

BH’s obese company secretary and another power-suit big shot (Head, Corporate Services, I think) come into the office, with all the drama and loud voices in the world.

After they scoop two sugar truckloads to their green tea (they actually demanded green tea because they are both on a diet), I settle down to my uncontested note-taker role.

Background- BH’s lending strategy and ‘aggressive marketing’ had resulted in a long term liquidity issue and LT’s legal expertise was called to the rescue.

Apparently, one can’t trust laymen to understand lofty legalese so Posh-Tall is providing legal opinion and explanation. And she does it well. She is brilliant. She introduces and explains securitisation in Naira and Kobo-speak. Soon, the green tea drinkers are mentally repackaging of most of their cash-flow producing financial assets into investment-worthy securities.

That way, BH’s balance sheet stays healthy, their customers are not overcharged to make up for the liquidity issues, LT comes out saving the (financial) world.


I love the law.

Pre-trial drama


Today is pre-trial and since Ghandi has some matter in another court, he suggests I meet him in Court 5 at 12pm. Thankfully, I remember from Law School that pre-trials are less formal- counsel don’t have to do the big black robe and wig thing. It actually makes practical sense; pre-trials are not trials per se and why bother with the extra sweat when you can lose it.
So, I arrive at the court right on time and to a formally dressed- any more formality and they’ll be speaking in King James.
Every one turns as I walk in and can probably see ‘Rookie’ on my forehead. Ghandi is sitting across and almost starts his annoying clucking.

“Rookie, I thought you knew?”
“Knew eh?”

I am absolutely embarrassed.
Ghandi goes on to explain that this court was usually robed because of the hours and some other reason I can’t get through my reddening ears.
Fortunately, the Judge is more concerned with getting business done than whether I looked different from the others.
Our matter gets called and Ghandi is the consummate advocate- all elegant and clearly spoken. Of course, it went well. No further drama- I guess it was largely due to the fact that my mouth was shut most of the time.

Monday, February 2, 2009

Grumble Grumble


Grumble grumble.

I am with the Prof at the canteen, complaining about the not-that delicious over-priced food; our unavoidable heels and the stress they give to your spine (well, until they make flattering flats for my chunky legs); and Monday and work- generally complaining about any thing worth complaining. It probably has something with the extra heavy traffic to work today. Ghandi and Muktar (another lawyer at LT) join us and pitch in the pity-party. We move on to more misery-worthy topics and soon we’re on being a lawyer and the stress; long hours, the robes and wig and anything we could pick at. At some point, we even whinge about duplicating soliciting and advocacy work.
Muktar is in the middle of his whining, when he turns to me-

“Rookie, you are so lucky, you just started and don’t have as much responsibility. You should enjoy it while you can”
(Interpret- “You do nothing, yet you moan louder than me”, interlaced with a patronizing ‘back in my day etc’)

I decide he has selective amnesia so I nicely remind my three-year senior that we work equal hours.
He smiles, probably surprised at my nerve.
The party soon breaks off and frustrations properly vented, we polish off our plates and go back to work.
Just as I thought- no matter how much we complain, we love what we do - and it puts food on the table.